I've just been reading the responses to the question I posted about 8 months ago, wow where does the time go. Alot has happened since then. I just want to say thanks to all of you that responded, thanks for being so positive. I've been doing alot of soul searching and praying and reading, and growing for the past 8 months. In fact I'm meeting with members of the Ward near us this week, things are really turning around.  
When I first sent my question to this site I wasn't sure how people would react. But I knew I was sending it with total honesty, and I was really hurting back then. I'm grateful for the way you all responded to me. I'm grateful for alot of things these days :)  
Thanks Brothers